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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24058039">The ghost of you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirakun/pseuds/shirakun'>shirakun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Banana Fish (Anime &amp; Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Feels, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Feels, Ghost Ash, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, I'm not sure it's happy tho, M/M, Moving On, Okumura Eiji Needs a Hug, Okumura Eiji-centric, Post-Canon, Soulmates, Their relationship is so special, i cried while writing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:20:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,012</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24058039</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirakun/pseuds/shirakun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'll wait. Forever, if that's what it takes" Eiji said.<br/>[...]<br/>Since he knew that Ash was killed, for the very first time, a true smile appeared on his face.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ash Lynx &amp; Okumura Eiji, Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The ghost of you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Eiji received a particular call from a friend he made in America. After that call, everything changed. </p><p>This super short story takes places some time after that call.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eiji didn't hear his mother calling him before going out with his sister. His father was abroad those days, not that he cared anyway. Well, he obviously cared about his family, who helped him a lot after he came back from his last trip, since he couldn't do much things on his own. His physical health was getting better and better, but he couldn't find the strength he needed to go forward. It was like his body was moving on, leaving his soul behind, stuck in the past.<br/>
"You should get up, oniisan" said a voice from the other room.<br/>
Eiji's dream was to show his motherland to one special person he met in America. That guy changed him in some way, therefore he wanted to return the favor.<br/>
"You can't lay down all day, you know. You'll have all the time to do nothing once your hair turns grey and you're old enough to only care about gardening or something"<br/>
Eiji's face was full of tears, as it happened every morning. It became kind of usual for him to wake up crying. It was really loud at the beginning: Eiji would find his family at the end of the bed, his mother sweating and looking like she just saw a ghost or something. She would immediately hug her son, trying to comfort him until he stopped shaking. As the day passed, Eiji's cry would become more silent, no more screams, just never ending tears running down his cheeks.<br/>
"Same nightmare?" the guy asked, as he entered the room. Eiji stopped for one second, looking right in front of him. Ash was wearing unusual clothes that definitely didn't match his usual, more casual style. "What are you looking at?" the blonde guy asked.<br/>
Eiji went downstairs to have breakfast, although it was almost midday. Since that call, every day, every moment seemed the same to him. Empty, useless. He was trying to force himself to eat at least a couple times a day, and even though he mostly ate junk food, he considered that a little win.<br/>
"You have to eat properly, you know" Ash said. "Life goes on".<br/>
It was a nice sunny day. A warm ray of sunlight kissed the boy's face. Eiji raised his hand as he could grab that particular ray coming through the window.<br/>
"How could I move on?" he asked himself, while he was holding a cup of hot coffee with his other hand.<br/>
Ash touched his shoulder. "You have to" he whispered. "Im sorry"<br/>
"I can't. I'm trying, I'm doing my best" the other sobbed. He put down the cup, fearing that it could slip away from his weak hand.<br/>
Forehead to forehead, Ash could see all the pain behind his friend's eyes. He touched his cheek - soft, still a bit wet from the tears, down to his neck, until he wrapped Eiji in a soft hug, like the ones he was used to receive from the dark haired boy.</p><p>_________</p><p>"Honey, are you ready? The flight is in one hour, we should go". The voice of Eiji's mother wasn't as loud as he was used to.<br/>
"Coming". Eiji closed the main door and moved to the family car.<br/>
"Don't cry too much, oniisan" the voice behind him said.<br/>
"Don't worry, I run out of tears" Eiji thought, a sad smile appearing on his face.<br/>
Ibe was in the car too. He watched the young boy with compassion and sadness. "I know how much he meant to you. I'm sorry" he said in a whisper, as if he was scared of Eiji's reaction if he talked a bit louder. As if Eiji would turn to pieces from one moment to another, like a clay sculpture that crashes to the ground.<br/>
"Don't be. This world was too cruel for him. Maybe it's better this way" he didn't thought those things. Ash definitely didn't deserve that, of course. Eiji was sure he could live a normal life in Japan, with him. He wanted to protect him from all those guns and suffering, which was the only reality Ash knew, but not the only one possible. He wanted to be sure Ash would fall asleep without any knives under his pillow because he would have been sure to wake up safe and sound the following day. He wanted to show Ash how much he loved him, without asking anything back.<br/>
"He will watch over you forever" Ibe said, trying to comfort Eiji, who didn't answer immediately. He just nodded, looking out of the window. He already knew his Ash was always by his side: in fact, sometimes he felt like he never left.



There were times when Eiji could feel a sense of warmth, like someone was close to him, even when he was alone at home. But he was also scared to wake up one day and realize he forgot Ash's voice. Or the color of his bright eyes. Or his scent, or the way he walked and moved. He was scared he could forget his soft face, his beautiful smiles, the ones only Eiji knew. The ones that made him feel special, like he was the only one Ash trusted enough to let him see his soft side. 



Eiji tried not to listen to the voice inside his head who was trying to made him cry again. He tried to focus on a cloud he saw, looking up to hold back the tears. 



He would surely forget his Ash's voice. All the photos he took would help him remember the small details of his face, the color of his hair, but not how soft it was under his touch. Some things would eventually vanish, but the spot in Eiji's heart will always belong to Ash. And the guy knew they were going to meet again, one day.<br/>
"I'll wait. Forever, if that's what it takes" Eiji said.<br/>
"What?"<br/>
"Nothing, I was talking to myself" the guy answered. Since he knew that Ash was killed, for the very first time, a true smile appeared on his face.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Uhm hello, I wrote this very short story on 24/06/19 and I always kept it private since I didn't know what to do.<br/>I've decided to share it here, maybe someone  will appreciate it. Feel free to tell me if you liked it or not, and why, so I can improve my writing skills!<br/>Also thank you for reading, I apologize if my English isn't perfect (it's not my first language!)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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